In my previous post, I said that I blamed barbed wire for my cut foot. Not true. In fact, I blamed “bobwire”. This was the earliest indication of my future literary genius. Like Shakespeare, I have displayed a tremendous talent for creating words.
Shakespeare is credited with having invented worthless words like “bedroom,” and “advertising”. These are hardly as majestic as the words I invented. In addition to the previously-mentioned “bobwire”, I invented two masterpieces: “sheekwok” and “brocteyew”.
Sheekwok is an adjective that is pronounced “sheikh-wok”, and has nothing to do with Arabs who take up Asian cooking. Sheekwok is used exclusively to describe walls that are slightly crooked. My pastor must have heard me use it because one day he said that a stapler was good to use if you wanted to affix a sign to a sheekwok wall.
Brocteyew (pronounced “BROCK-tuh-you”) is a word that means “sponsored”. It became famous after the television announcers somehow learned of my invention. They began describing television shows as being “brocteyew by Gillette,” and “brockteyew by the Ford Motor Company”.
To this day, it's hard for me to believe how much I influenced the English language as a 5-year-old.
Jack
“Just Call Me William” Parker
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